New thoughts on REALLY old post

New thoughts on 27 Dresses

So 2 years ago…all I wanted was the day…a day when all eyes would be on me. Now what I want is just to spend the rest of my life with the man I love. I still want to get married before he does, but I don’t mind waiting. I still want everything before, but I want it more now. I want more than ever to sleep next to him and wake up next to him, to make dinner for him and to cuddle up on a couch with him at the end of the night, and do it all over again the next day. I even want all the hard times, the bills and the stupid fights, everything.

I was right to worry about Pennsylvania, but in the end it gave me a new found appreciation for him that I would not have had if he hadn’t gone to school out there. It has been just about 4 years and he’s my best friend in the whole world, and he’s everything I could’ve wished or hoped for.

So in the movie she says that her favorite part of the wedding is when the bride is walking down the aisle and everyone turns to look at her, she likes to look at the groom, because there is such love and affection in his expression. I love it.

So now it is my turn to wait patiently (or as patiently as possible) for everything to happen. But either way, I can say that I’m happy just to have him in my life. Whether it happens in a year or 10 years, it doesn’t matter anymore. All I know is that when it happens I won’t be looking to see how many people are looking at me, or how big and extravagant everything is, I will be looking at him, because his eyes are the only ones that matter to me anymore.

Weekend

This past weekend my cousin Todd got married to a wonderful girl named Jenn. I know they will be extremely happy together. And I wish them the best of luck in their lives together.

My family and I had the pleasure of driving to Hobart and Merriville to witness Todd and Jenn's wedding. Danny and I set out with 3 different sets of directions there..confusing enough i know. We set out fine and we got all the way to Portage then thought we missed the exit so we turned around an got off in Valpo. We got turned around again and ended up in Westville. We ended up going the wrong way so we had to turn around. But eventually we made it to the church we were still about 30 mins early. It was the first Catholic wedding i've ever been to...it was nice. It was a long night but it was a lot o fun.

On Sunday we got up super early to get breakfast and then we got in the hot tub for a few minutes. Before long we had most of the family with us. It was fun to swim around with the family. After the swim it was time to check out and head for home. But first we went to Denny's with Troy, Chad and Meghan. I love my cousins!

So the weekend came to an end and today it is time to get back to reality. Lots of work this week..my only day off being on Wednesday. Good thing is that I get to spend time with Danny : )

Long time...

It has been a very very long time since i have written anything on my blog. So So So much has changed and happened since the last time i wrote. There have been heart breaks and reunions, birthdays and holidays and lots of theater.

To start with, Danny came home from school and got a job somewhere in Michigan and lived with his dad again. But that didn't work out, so he went back to Discount and got his job back there..and since he was in Elkhart he came and lived with us : ). He even has his own room which he likes. We are doing better now than we were before he went to school. Being apart made us appreciate each other so much more than we did. He now has an amazing job at Tom Naquins' working as a Nissan tech. We are beginning to save money so that we can move out, it will be a while but we are gonna get there.

Me..i have been doing ok. School ended more than a month ago and I could not be happier about that! I have only done one play since i did the Halloween show. We did a show called WIT which was all about a woman struggling with ovarian cancer. After the end of that show i finished out the school year. But as soon as the school year ended i began picking up shifts at work. And that has been my life since the end of April. I think i need to adopt my school sleep schedule though, because i am just exhausted. I know i don't work Mon-Fri 8-5 but i do work about 5 or 6 days a week.

I am hoping that this summer i can enjoy the warm weather and be able to hang out with my friends and Danny a lot. Since Danny has his new job i only see him on weekends and almost every other night when i am home. Today is my usual Tuesday double shift, host in the morning and then expo at night. Unfortunately today is a Buy 1 get 1 free Burger...which means our Tinker Tuesday $3.95 is buy 1 get 1 free. Lunch today was INSANE!!! And tonight i am not looking forward to this crazy mess that i will in. It is time for work now...we'll see how i can survive this night!

Maybe

"Maybe it's time to change
And leave it all behind
I've never been one to walk alone
I've always been scared to try
So why does it feel so wrong
To reach for something more
To wanna live a better life
What am I waiting for?
'Cause nothing stays the same
Maybe it's time to change"

~ Sick Puppies "Maybe"

Summer and School

So I realized that with only 4 days of summer left that this has been a kind of disappointing and not complete summer. I knew that this would be a kind of dull summer what with Danny being gone, but I didn't think it would be as bad as it was. This summer had its highs like going to Pennsylvania to visit Danny, and going to the drag races in Ohio. But it also had its low points, no Danny, no camping, hardly any friend time. But most of all, no Wisconsin. They every summer family vacation to Crandon, Wisconsin. All summer long whenever it was a chilly morning or a really windy day, even right after it had rained I would say "It feels like a Wisconsin day!". No matter where I go in the world, I think that Crandon will always be my favorite place. I love the way everything smells up there, and the sound of the waves. No summer seems to be complete without a trip to Wisconsin.

With summer coming to an end..I am heading straight for a really busy schedule. However, I am hoping for an awesomely amazing end to my summer with this Labor Day weekend. Saturday Danny comes home. Sunday is Blueberry Festival (always exciting)!!!! And Monday is Eric's birthday party then Danny goes back to school. School starts on Tuesday, and I'm not looking forward to my first class. Although I am excited to start a new semester at Southwestern Michigan. My first class happens to be Math, not my favorite subject. This class is followed by a drive over to the the Dowagiac campus for Psychology. Following the end of Psyc I get to come home and eat, and not long after that I get to drive to Osceola for play practice.

Not only will I have this play (Life, Love and the Pursuit of Happiness: An Evening of One Act Plays) the day after it ends I am immediately involved in another play (Spoon River Anthology). My schedule will be crazy and I am hoping I can handle it.

finally

I finally think i have found where and what i am supposed to be doing. I applied to Southwestern Michigan University and was nervous about being accepted. And every day I anxiously awaited for a letter saying whether i got in or not. And finally today after all this waiting I got my letter. I opened the letter not knowing what to think and starting reading and I got very excited. The first word was Congratulations! My heart jumped! It proceeded to say that I was accepted and that I needed to send them my transcript from Ivy Tech then I can register for classes. I got my student ID, my email and password. The last thing on the letter said "Welcome to Southwestern Michigan University" and it was almost instant relief. I feel like i'm doing the right thing for the first time since I started school.

Environmental Science is what I want to be doing and I am so excited to be going to SMU!

The 4th...

This year the 4th of July was not at all normal. Normally the weekend before the 4th or the weekend of the 4th, we have our annual reunion in Middlebury. Not this year. The original plan was to have a gathering at Essenhaus, then that fell through so no reunion. Also the past 2 4th of July's Danny and I have had a pretty nice little display of fireworks. The first year we had 2 back packs full. Last year we had a duffel bag and and back pack full. This year? The only fireworks I bought were the lame flashers and a box of crackle balls. So no fireworks bought. Then lastly, Danny's not here. It's very strange to not have him here to go watch fireworks, or to be buying fireworks.

The only fireworks I have seen are the Bremen ones and then Black Squirrel ones. Bremen's were last night and they were pretty cool. Troy and I walked around the Fair and as per tradition we had to play the win a fish game. And one out of 56 balls and of course it was Troy's. Then we went back to the Huff's and we played some more croquet, then back to watch fireworks.

Tonight we went to Goshen and watched fireworks. I took corn hole and my dad and Troy and Grandpa and I played. I actually had a good corn hole night. Fireworks were awesome tonight!

I had the choice yesterday to go to the beach with some friends. My car has a wheel barring that is going bad and I didn't want to risk driving all the way up to St. Joe and risking breaking down someplace. Instead I went to Bremen and had a fun afternoon and evening with my family.

But overall this has been a very weird and strange 4th of July...